Giving Myself Grace

I think I write some version of this post every year, but I’m going to keep writing it until it doesn’t feel necessary anymore – either as a reminder to myself, or to anyone reading.

I truly love blogging so much. I love having a place to share the cute outfits I find, to share a new hair tool that’s made my routine a tiny bit more accessible, or just to share about what’s on my mind. And the community that I’ve found, through my blog and Instagram and Facebook? That community is truly irreplaceable, and I had no idea how important to me that would be when I wrote my first blog post in 2017. I couldn’t have known! I will be forever grateful for it.

But sometimes… sometimes the reality is, balancing being disabled and the extra time that takes (for me, at least), plus my day job, plus my blog, plus spending time with friends and family, plus reading and relaxing… it can be a lot. And sometimes, the ever-increasing list of things on my never-ending to do list just feel overwhelming. Because I don’t want to just coast in any of these aspects of my life – I want to excel. I want to be on top of my job and take initiative and stay on top of deadlines. I want to blog every week day, share on Instagram throughout the day, and keep growing my audience. I want to read and relax and spend time with friends on the weekends.

Basically, I want to do it all. And I know, logically, that’s impossible. And I know when I’ve shared about being burnt out before, people have said “It’s fine! Take the time off (from the blog) that you need! We’ll be here when you get back!” Everyone has always been so kind and supportive. But the issue is – even if people feel like I’m not letting them down, I still feel like I am. I feel like I’m letting myself down. It’s so hard not to meet your own expectations of yourself – because you also know there’s no one you can blame but yourself.

So that’s what I’m trying to be better at – being okay with letting go of some of my expectations of myself. Maybe it means taking the day off from a blog post here and there when I know that I need a break. Or taking a few hours over the weekend to unplug and read, even if it means I won’t be able to pull together my favorites from an upcoming sale that’s happening. Basically – I’m trying to be okay with giving myself the grace that I know others already give me.

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